Akhirnya gw jadi rajin ngeblog lagi meski tetep ngga ada yang baca. Tomo bahkan kemaren nanya, kenapa ga ada yg komen di blog gw, apakah blog gw ada yg baca? :)) Gw bilang emang ngga ada. Tapi gapapa kok. I write because it helps me think. Not because I want readers. Cos if I want readers I can always just write for kelascinta.com or to LovableLadies, where they will publish my writings so it will reach my readers.
But I am here because writing helps me think. There are many topics I can’t decide where I stand on, yet. For example, I don’t feel quite right about the concept where girls should be free to show as much skin as they want, and the guys should be solely responsible in holding their libido. But let’s let this topic slide for now.
Today I’m here to talk about being a Classy Lady. This is a concept on which many girls will nod their heads in agreement. And yet, those girls can also practice it the wrong way. It’s difficult to be all three: Girl with a mind, bitch with attitude, and lady with class. Brain, beauty, behavior. It’s crucial, and extremely not easy. I’m writing today to determine the steps needed to be such a lady.
1. To have a class, first you have to determine your class.
For example. I will refrain from hanging out with unemployed people. I will refrain from hanging out with lazy people who like to come late for meetings. I will refrain from people who like to borrow money. I will refrain from people who like to cuss, especially if they like to cuss me.
In romance, I definitely don’t wanna be the type of girl who would go after other girls’ boyfriend. Not because I’m humble, like, I can’t beat the girl, but more because I don’t wanna be that kind of girl. And I don’t wanna have a boyfriend who would in the future leave me for someone else.
Can you see where I set my lines?
So know your boundaries—or better yet, decide your boundaries. Then all you have to do is to be brave enough to say hell no to things that push your boundaries. You deserve to be secure. You have all the rights to have boundaries. Wait. I even think it’s a must. You MUST know the lowest limits you can bear.
2. Give the best for yourself.
I like playing The Sims so much. There was a time when I spent my holiday days only to play this game, morning til night. I like it because in the game I can make an ideal character. Works hard, goes to the spa, takes courses and reads books, and so on.
I am now at the age where I realize I can do the same thing with my life. I can live the life that I want. Like the ones I made in the game. I don’t have to only dream it. I can actually live it.
Now I’m living pretty much the life I usually made in The Sims. I work for a good company, I read (sometimes), I go to spa and get my hair done every other day, I hang out with friends, etc etc.
I also found out that if I start to think of my life as “not mine”, but as “the life of someone I love the most”, I start to want to give the best for myself. Be the most ideal version of myself. I also start to feel thankful of how I have been treating myself.
Does this sound crazy? Well actually it a bit is crazy, but this is how I survived.
3. For fuck’s sake, just love yourself already!
I used to tell someone to treat your heart like a small little kid that knows nothing. One day the kid’s got a throat inflammation. As any little kid would, this kid likes to eat fries, ice cream, and other food that should be avoided when you have a throat problem.
You know better than this kid. You are wiser than this kid.
Would you, as the guardian of this kid, let her eat all those harmful things just to feed her desires? Would you, as the guardian of this kid, let her harm herself — or even help her harm herself?
You wouldn’t. I bet you wouldn’t. Cos you love the kid. You care for her safety. You care for her well being. That’s how you should care for your heart. Love yourself the way you love a little girl. Avoid harmful people the way you wouldn’t let the little kid eat too much fries. Appreciate yourself the way you would cheer everytime the little kid wins something. For fuck’s sake, just love yourself already!
Now close this browser and go practice them 3 steps already.